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You are here : home > Child Development > Social Behaviour > Timid Children and Aggressive Children > Comments

Comments:

Name: pooja chawda
Country: India
 Hello everyone, it is really good to visit this kind of site. An emotional journey nicely shared by all parents. Which motivates me to seek advice from all of you. My son is 2 years and 3 months, i am working mother n my husband is Child specialist, heet is our first child and we both love him too much even grand parents ( Nanaji & Dadi) are pampering him too much. Since last 3 days i am observing that he is become very stubborn and taking everything negatively only, if i say be a good boy he says no i am bad boy than, he is very reactive to word call "NO" in a way that, he starts crying if i say no even if i want to stop him like don't do it, he becomes reactive. What shall i do?
Name: Rishita
Country: dubai
 yes its very true. even my son is very moody. we have to keep trying different tricks to please him.
Name: Rashmi
Country: india
 my daughter is two and she is very naughty despite understanding good or bad!but fortunately she comes around and says sorry after i punish her.it's very true that children nowadays do need smaking here and there
Name: Cyn
Country: usa
 i have an almost 5-yr old boy who does not want to mind me at all; this has been a challenge ever since he was born. whenever i discipline him, he seems to think it is ok to hit and scream at me. we are seeking some outside help finally, because all children, when growing up and learning right from wrong, get upset. but our son should have outgrown this by now. please say a prayer for us.
Name: Anon
Country: england
 i think that your article is interesting & useful although i don't understand why others have to write such filth & ruin the nature of this site
Name: katie
Country: netherlands
 i have read through the views on this webpage and think some people are completely sick. although you were probably having a sick laugh you should definately grow up. there are people in this world that had had terrible things happen to them and i don't think you have the right to make fun of other peoples problems.
Name: Darshana
Country: india
 spanking should not be allow because it teaches children to hit back and effect children's because it teaches child to hit back and it effect child's behaviour.
Name: Ashley
Country: indonesia
 child smaking is bad and people should use positive disipline with there voices
Name: shivangi
Country: germany
 this article is very helpfull to me,,i m trying to follow dis,,but i guess i ve to be very kewl and clam,, but it works,,,thanks
Name: Min
Country: usa
 this is to cyn. my son is also almost 5yrs.old. we had alot of the same problems and feelings. he should of outgrown it by now. we found a condition called o.d.d. look it up online, it bet it will spark a light bulb for you. hope it helps. p.s the key really is consistancy and stay calm. they feed off your reactions.
Name: leigh
Country: england
 my child is nearly 5 and she is agressive,impatient and screams,kicks and shouts im at the end of my teather what should i do?
Name: hh
Country: india
 my son is also naughty so when hes bad i grab him by the ear bring him to a chair and spank and its very hardit leaves big hand prints him then his father whippes him. if he says bad words he gets all of that with a bar of soap in his mouth then i put him in his room then he has to write a letter to me and who ever he did the naughty thing to and it says why he did it what he did and what the consenquence is
Name: henryetta
Country: england
 i think you are all sick, children dont deserve to be beaten
Name: sue
Country: usa
 i have twin boys that are very naughty but sometimes i spank them, and other times i just laugh because it's so cute watching them grow and become somewhat independent. i let them explore and really just let them have fun. spanking is good sometimes but joining in what they are doing will help you understand why they do the things they do. everything is so new to them, let play with the pots. they grow up really fast, we'll have time to punish them when they understand what they are doing wrong. at 18 months, my boys are just exploring.
Name: a mother of 2
Country: england
 excellent advice if only people would listen.children these days have to much telly watching and not enough other stimulation,like walking.also they have forgotton ow to play they need computers etc,whereas when i was young like many of you i spent hours collecting bits and pieces like empty bottles etc to play shop with my friends.kids need to be taught how to use their imaginations again to prevent boredom which leads to naughty behavior and crime in later life.i know this as my daughter who is 5 has been really trying and i often cried because i felt i couldnt cope but i got really good help and took all the advice i was given on board.rating for this site is excellent.
Name: The Beaten
Country: england
 i was smacked as a child. now i beat people up for a living. if the people you love are capable of inflicting physical pain they detach your emotions. sure you just might learn respect. more likely to learn to bottle up your resentment develop anger management issuse be unable to relate to peers and make suitable social connections. might as well just buy them a gun and teach them to climb clock towers. smacking is only an indication of a parent without the necessary social skills or intellegence to be a parent in the first place. if you smack your child your legacy will be violence. nice going mom/pop! learn to deal with your own anger. learn the skills you need to control your kids. read a book and stop taking advice from crack pots with enough time to post drivvel on noticeboards. must go now have to break a guys knee-caps. happy smacking wackos!
Name: Tiffany
Country: usa
 my son will be 3yrs old the end of feb. i am a 18yr old mom. which i have my mom and dad here with me, but he is one, how do i put it, wild youngin. he does the opposite of what i say to do all the time. spankin, switching, or timeouts does nothing. it might sit him down for at least 5 minutes but he will be back up doing it again. i tell him that he dont need to be doing this and that and talking to him but he will get mad and start hitting me, i spank him, and he will hit me again. i was just woundering if anyone knew if that was abnormal or was it just a typical 3yr old. i just want at least 2 yrs to pass by so he will listen a little better. i hate to see him getting kicked out of preschool. which he loves kids, going to church, writing, drawing, and etc. but from experienced moms out there the question is for yall.. is it going to get better ? or is it just out for the worst?
Name: concerned sane parent
Country: england
 im very dissapointed that some sad individuals think they have the god given right to put pathetic sick comments on this site that has been designed purely for parents with genuine worries about their children.one thing i have to say to you saddo`s grow up and get a bloody life.moronic prats!and to the people that created this web site and allow this rubbish to be displayed,i will certainly warn people against your website as i think most of the people who leave messages are sick sick sick,i don`t normally condone violence but give me 5 mins in a room with some of these twats and they wont be printing such crap again in a hurry.from a normal well balanced mother.
Name: abc
Country: usa
 article is too brief ... more helpful tips should have been there .. not really satisfied.
Name: BOB
Country: usa
 i have 2 defiant twin girls.they are 13. i ask them to clean their room and they say no.i need help on how to discipline.
Name: StrictMom
Country: usa
 i don't think a good spanking ever hurt anyone permanently. until about the age of 12 i got spanked for misbehaving. i spanked my kids..over the knee with pants down till they were about that age. they are both sucessfull mature adults who discipline their children in the same way. only for really bad behavior..it works!
Name: Anna
Country: italy
 every kid needs a good spank once in a while! we should only use our hands, not a belt or spoon or shoe or anything else like that. and just lightly on the bare bottem, on the hand has no effect. i usally count to 5, if lisa (my 7 year old) dosent stop behaving badly buy then, she gets her bum smacked.
Name: tracy
Country: united kingdom
 children should be treated with respect and only then will parents gain respect. they are innocent human beings and dont see right from wrong.sit down wth your kids and talk to them instead of shouting at them. your anger only rubs of on them.it does work!!!
Name: Broadswordbadger
Country: united kingdom
 has anybody made the connection between education and corporal punishment? some of the people posting within this forum seem to be barely literate. these same people are advocating physical harm to children. i'm shocked, appalled at terms such as "whip" "belt" and "switching" - which, through my rudimentary knowledge of north american "english", i believe means to beat with a stick. do correct me if i'm mistaken. get a grip. we're adressing problematic children, not dogs. there seems to be a raging beast inside some of you. that's what needs taming, along with admitting that many of you need to find professional help, preferably parenting classes. the article i read on the preceding page was insightful. i agree with abc of usa; more helpful tips would be useful. i echo and applaud the sentiments of the beaten, of england. however, after trawling through this page of vitriol, i wonder if it may have been a primer in order to capture the ip addresses of paedophiles and familial child abusers.
Name: Sharyn
Country: england
 i think its absolutely shocking certain articles written about kids. people should be ashamed of writing such filth against kids. replying to people who actually need advice or posting there views. i dont personally use smacking, as using violence will repeat itself in later life. i calmy ask my son to stop what he is doing as it is not nice/will hurt someone etc and if fails i will hold his arms firmly make him look at me and firmly ask him again, if this fails raise voice, then shout and if that fails which normally doesnt he will be put in his room 'time out' and hold the door till he calms down. also praising when he does what he is told is a great way to keep them behaving. this method works best when used from early stages but you can turn them around - but will take a lot of patience and staying calm and in control is very important. i hope this is of any help sharyn x
Name: jasim_12@yahoo.com
Country: india
 ihave no child.so our coments unnessesary. right.although i think nougty child is a very tellent and innovative. its i belive.
Name: benj
Country: usa
 i work in a school occasionally i have to restrain a child, because they are totally out of control. while doing this i have to give them as little attention as possible. some parents give long time outs or tear down their children with their words when they disobey. we must treat our children with respect. i think it is much more mercifull to giv the child a couple or more of slapps on tha bottom (nowhere else) and its over. no long drug out lectures, or depriveing of attention in fact a hug after words would be good too. ther is a differece betwean spanking and beating alot of the time when people talk about haw bad dangerous and damaging spanking is they are refering to beating. beating is abuse it is wrong. it is counter productive
Name: anon
Country: india
 i think that some people on this site are perverts. i have 5yr old twins and only smacked them once, when i was out of control, now 24, ive been to lessons keeping your child/ren under control and now im a great parent and i never smack.
Name: jessica(baby sitter)
Country: usa
 my name is jessica heres what you do you lock them in a room that is safe and let them stay in there 25 min. if they are at a party actng up and there haveing fun but acting terrible put them in an area where no one is haveing fun for 30 minute. for more advice go to jesse_cake@yahoo. com
Name: Beanie
Country: united kingdom
 some of these things that what people are saying is absolute nonsense. dont get me wrong children should behave and should be disaplined but not in extreme lenghts which lead to abuse
Name: DONT WORRY ABOUT IT
Country: usa
 i came on here to find out some info or advice and the things i seen i just want to throw up it makes me so mad and upset how some of u treat your children or the other that are just being mean nasty and perverted sounds like half of u are child abusers
Name: Disgusted
Country: usa
 you people on this site need help or jesus. my son is very unruly and i spank him like once a month but depriving him of priviledges works better than hitting because when i hit out of frustration of his bad behavior, he learns that. i have to learn no the be so strict on him, too. he is only five, he has been to 5 different daycares before he started school. but spanking bare bottoms for little kids can irreparable damage them pysically if you dont know what your doing as well as emotionally. not to mention they may grow to like and you have just ruined their fragile sexuality.
Name: anonymous
Country: australia
 treat children with some respect god damn it! it is both physical and sexual abuse. if you people are loving parents you would take the time to diguse with your spouse about some non violent approach to your childs behavior.
Name: MamaJp
Country: usa
 i'm truly sorry that so many expressing their views are using violent tactics. does anyone have any other methods to handle an unruly child? i am a grandmother to a 4 year old, who's father has sole custody. it's tough because the child is very sweet most of the time but does occasionally go into violent rage. there must be a solution? any really good viable ideas? thanks.
Name: Sarah chrismont
Country: australia
 i'm a 37 year old full time mum, have 5 beautiful kids between the age of 2-14 and i'm expecting my 6th next march. i have only ever spanked once as a trial on my eldest child,alexandra and i never did it again because i felt so bad. i've followed the 'time out and privledge technique' reccomended by the child psychologist and i also reccomend it because its worked a treat on my lot
Name: Judy
Country: usa
 i have a 8 y/o daughter that is very bad,she steals,lies,fights with everyone,seems like the only thing that gets through to her is a good old fashion bare butt switching.
Name: rachel
Country: australia
 my name is rachel, and i have been a child psychologist for the past 12 years,i also have 3 wonderful children, 2 boys and 1 girl and i'm strongly against spanking. it teaches your children to resolve disputes with violence where as a"time out" lets your child calm down and reflect on what they have done. if bad behavior continues i reccomend you take away privledges such as tv, gameboy or phone calls.
Name: Sharyn
Country: united kingdom
 smacking should not be brough back. the right to smack was taken away from teachers because they wer beating the children up. a smack is a very very last resort. as i posted before, use repeatitive methods. ask them to stop, then take there arms make them look at you and in a stern voice say 'stop it now, thats not nice' for eg if they dont listen hold them and raise ur voice slightly deepening the tone. if this fails put them to there naughty place for 1 min of every year of there life. a naughty place should have no toys/tv/anything that can distract them from what they are there for. smaking just encourages anger in children and promotes it, hense why the boys in your area hit you. my advise, next time you are walking, take a camera or recorder and take the evidence to the police - a caution to the parents will show them. with proper teaching parnets can learn how to bring up there children, its all about how you treat a child when they are behaving and when they are bad. they should be completely different. my four year old son has only ever been smacked once, on the hand because he put my neices life at danger. it didnt hurt but it frightened him - showing immediate concern for what he was doing. i never ever threaten him that i will smack him as he will only do the same to people/kids around him and become a bully. i hope people can trust me on this one and work hard at making it work. violence reguarly used against kids will only make them aggressive adults. sharyn xx
Name: Sherm
Country: usa
 as kids, we were grounded or barred from tv etc when we were naughty, instead of spanked. i've never been smacked on the butt, though at times i wondered if it would have been a better option
Name: Gillian
Country: ireland
 up until i was eighteen, i had to bare my bottom and touch my toes while my father slippered me, my brother and mother were usually witness, as wa si when it was his turn. this was certainly not an erotic scene and i wince at the memory, though now it would smack my kids bare though not just as severely
Name: goci
Country: malta
 people are not to be spanked! children are people too! they're not animals in a circus whom we try tricks on like mice in an experimenting lab! even circuses go against their victim's rights and what about children? innocent human beings!!! where are human rights? have you ever thought of what the consequencies might be in their lives? what about yours? is it this same way you want your children to love you back!!!???
Name: Jennifer
Country: usa
 i agree mia, i was raised the same way and my daughter is spanked as a last resort when she's way otu of line and it did me a lot of good and will do her a lot of good too i think. it seems to so far.
Name: Mia
Country: usa
 i was spanked growing up with a small paddle and it never did me any bad, in fact my parents tried other things and they didn't work and all the kids in the family that were never spanked were the ones in trouble all the time and now i spank my kids the same way. they're very well behaved. i don't abuse them like some suggest on this site but they know what a good spanking is. and i get complements on there behavior a lot.
Name: Catherine Anne
Country: usa
 little darlings should not have to go through this, its sick and twisted. the occasional slap on the hand will do no harm but from what i've read her about innocent 3 year olds being spankind with belts makes my stomach turn! who could be so mean to a small child. god help those little kids. some people should not be parents! this is downright sickening and in my eyes child abuse!
Name: madison leigh parker
Country: usa
 i live in manhattan in new york city, in the west village and i have never heard of this! this is abuse, your kids will only resent you for it and hate you behind your back, they will be afraid of you and that is one thing my 4 year old twin daughters, lily and molly will never feel. sure they have their moments where they scream and shout and fight and hit (not often)but all kids do, its a part of growing up and you should deal with this behavior in ways such as time out or sometimes even let them fight it out themselves, its healthy its normal.most respectable decent american people dont put their kids through this and the few who do shame on you!
Name: omg!
Country: estonia
 i seriously think some opf you people are sick! a child should never be hurt under any circumstances! maybe if they are realy naughty they should get a gentle slap on the bum, but nothing like you freaks are putting down! i pity you and your children
Name: Linda
Country: united kingdom
 i have two children, a boy aged 14 and a girl aged 12. as a child myself if i misbehaved i was spanked on the bare bottom. i carry out the same punishment to my own children, even at there ages. my worst punishment was when my dad spanked me, becaues i had to wait untill he came home from work, he spanked harder than my mother, and if i was very naughty he would sometines use a slipper to smack my bare bottom. it taught me a lesson to behave. our kid are treat the same and both will continue to do so untill they reach the age of sixteen. they know the rules of our home, and what will happen if they are broken.
Name: anon
Country: usa
 i can't believe how much everyone is reacting by saying we are "sick twisted individuals" for spanking our children. our children are our responsibility. we feed them and clothe them, and we have the right to punish them when they are being insolent.
Name: no spank
Country: united kingdom
 i dont believe in smacking, spanking etc. when i was little i was spanked for some sily things like one time i wasnt tired and couldnt sleep, so my dad called me down stairs layed me across his lap, pulled down my pj bottoms and spanked me, i hated it, dont spank your kids, you dont walk down the street and correct another adults behavior by hitting them so dont do it to your kids. and all these people who say they were spanked as a child and it hasnt done them any harm, well it has cos you all seem to have the nerve to pull down the childs pants and smack their behind until its red so you cant say it hasnt effected you cos it has.
Name: Gary
Country: united kingdom
 there are some sick people on this site! in my experience the parents who smack are the ones who can't be bothered to do the isolation and loss of privilege's method- yes it takes more effort, but it is proven to work! violence against a child is absolutely unacceptable in any circumstances!!! you should have your children taken away from you!
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